The Creepshow: A Novel Page 5

  Wanda brooded into her coffee mug as she scanned the pitiful performance of her funds and thought of all of the ways she would love to punish Thomas Champlain for ruining her portfolio. And her life.

  She hadn’t seen Xavier arrive, but all of a sudden, she heard his voice, whispering angrily with another colleague. She recognized it as Albert, Xavier’s associate. They were hidden by a partition on one side of Wanda’s desk.

  “You can’t be serious!” Albert said.

  “Ask the reporter,” Xavier said. “He can assure you that I’m indeed serious.” Wanda could tell he was grinning as he pronounced those words.

  “But they’re going to can you if the story comes out!”

  “Al, don’t tell me you’re that naïve. They’re going to fire me anyway.”

  “Then why haven’t they done it? You told them about Ito weeks ago.”

  “I’m sure they have their reasons,” Xavier said, his voice cool, unbothered by Al’s hysteria.

  So Xavier had spoken to the press, Albert thought he shouldn’t have—and who the hell knew when this whole story was going to explode? Wanda jumped, the papers spread across her keyboard spilling into her lap and onto the floor.

  “I didn’t mean to startle.” The receptionist, a young Chinese woman with lovely but halting English. “I wonder what time you like me to schedule cab?”

  “Cab?”

  “You leave today, yes?”

  Wanda nodded and hastily gathered her papers. The receptionist’s heavy veil of black hair fell over one shoulder as she looked at her notebook.

  “Four o’clock?” she asked.

  “Yes, yes, the flight is at four.”

  “You leave one o’clock. I call for you.”

  “OK, thanks,” Wanda said as the woman returned to her desk.

  She turned back to her computer and listened for the men’s voices. But all had fallen silent.

  Chapter 9

  “Wanda, we’re not going to make it for Hanukkah-Christmas,” her mother said as soon as Wanda answered the phone.

  Life in Paris had resumed, with all thoughts of Wanda’s adventures in New York and China pushed to the back of her mind as she tried to catch up on hugs with Nelly, mountains of laundry and mounds of paperwork.

  “I tried, I really tried,” her mother muttered. “But it’s impossible. We’re going to be stuck at home for the holidays.”

  Wanda’s mother was Jewish, and her father was Catholic, of French origin. Even though that made Wanda officially Jewish, “officially” she didn’t practice much of anything. But the family tradition was to celebrate both holidays.

  This year, however, she didn’t feel like celebrating, so her mother’s news came as a relief. She was less relieved to learn her father had broken his leg, though—the reason for the trip’s cancellation.

  “It’s a mess over here, Wanda.” She could see her mother shaking her head as she ran through the house, tackling ten tasks at once. “The airline, the insurers… All asking for dozens of papers. Your father can’t do a thing on his own. He’s driving me crazy. And that’s not the half of it.”

  Wanda decided this was the perfect excuse for lying if and when her mother asked, “How’s work?” or “How did the New York trip go?” But the conversation wasn’t moving in that direction.

  “How about you come home for the holidays, Wanda?” her mother asked. “It’s been a while since you’ve spent them in Boston. We’ll pay for your ticket.”

  “Mom, I can afford a plane ticket.” Wanda sighed, loudly enough to be heard over a transatlantic phone line. “But thank you.”

  “So you’ll come?”

  “I can’t. Work has been piling up. You know I’m just back from maternity leave.”

  “They won’t let you take time off, so that’s it. These damn companies.”

  “It’s normal, Mom. I mean, I was out for so long.”

  “Yes, having a baby, which is a common life event! But I guess Wall Street doesn’t understand that.”

  “Look, I feel bad enough as it is,” Wanda said, even though she wasn’t overly eager to spend a chaotic holiday back home. With all that was going on, she wanted peace and quiet more than anything else.

  “OK, honey, I know. All right. That’s fine. There will be other times. We’ll manage over here—eventually.”

  “Mom, listen. The first week or so is a pain, but Dad will get the hang of using crutches and will be back to his old self in no time.”

  Her mother was not paying attention. She had resumed her tirade, directed at no one in particular. Wanda sighed. She could listen as her mom complained, or she could cut the call short and then hear about that during their next conversation.

  A knock on the door made the decision for her.

  “Mom, someone’s at the door. I have to get it before the knocking wakes Nelly from her nap.”

  Her mother definitely understood that. While she wasn’t happy with Wanda’s relationship (or lack thereof) with Nelly’s father, she had become a doting grandmother and thought of Nelly’s comfort before all else.

  “Yes, yes, go ahead,” she said. “Call me back later so I can speak to my sweetheart, OK?”

  Wanda dropped her phone on the couch and hurried to the door. Nelly’s room was far enough away that she wouldn’t likely be disturbed by a gentle knock or even a doorbell, but Wanda didn’t want to take any chances. She pulled open the door, expecting maybe a delivery person, and then froze.

  “Wanda… I… I’ve come by a couple of times…”

  Max. She had never seen him bundled up for winter before. Her memories had been summer and sunshine, jeans and T-shirts. And here he stood wearing a brown duffle coat, his hands stuffed in the pockets. Then he ran a hand through his hair in that nervous manner of his. She focused on these details to distract herself from the fact that Max was standing within arm’s reach.

  Her heart was beating a mile a minute. What to say? What to say?

  “You’ve come by before?” she murmured.

  “Can I come in?”

  Wanda nodded and stepped back, nearly tripping over the collection of high heels in the vestibule.

  Max tossed his coat onto a hook, and she led him into the living room that he had gotten to know well more than a year ago. Would he notice the small pile of baby toys in the corner, or would he be too disturbed by her Saturday morning look to notice anything else? With no make-up, a ponytail and sweatpants, she was not at her best.

  “Sit down, please.” Her voice sounded stiff, unnatural, and she could kick herself for it. “So when did you come by… um… or get back?”

  “Over a month ago, I was here briefly. I came by, but no one was around. Then I came back last week. I tried to see you a couple of times. You must work late.”

  “I was on a business trip.”

  “How are things?”

  “OK.” You should tell him about Nelly right now. Galina’s voice echoed clearly in Wanda’s head, as if she were right there in the room coaching her.

  “Are you back for the holidays?” she said instead. Though Wanda could pull off successful presentations in front of clients, she found herself paralyzed with fear as she faced Max. This was going to be very, very bad. She could feel it. And it was her own fault. How could she have possibly made such a terrible decision?

  “Longer,” he said. “I’ve finished my mission. I just got a job in neurology at Bichat.”

  “Congratulations. That’s a great hospital.”

  “I missed you.”

  She looked down.

  “Have you found someone else?”

  She shook her head.

  “I thought… because you stopped calling…”

  “The connections were so bad, I could never reach you.”

  “Yeah, I know,” he said, with the lopsided grin that always made her heart race. “The worst conditions for a long-distance relationship.”

  “And you didn’t email,” she added. She hoped her tone didn’t so
und too defensive or accusatory. She was having trouble acting nonchalant.

  “Network problems.” He ran a hand through this hair. “I know, it’s hard to maintain a relationship that way. And I regret that.”

  “Do you regret that you went?”

  “Sometimes.” His eyes met hers, and she could read in them because of you. Her heart soared, but she wouldn’t let herself feel the joy. He continued, “But I did some good there. I can’t regret that.”

  “I understand. I’m glad you went.” She meant it. As hard as it was, part of what she loved about Max had been this will to help those in need.

  And then it began, softly, then louder. Nelly’s cry, as she woke from her nap. The crying had intensified since Wanda’s return from her travels. At first, Wanda thought it was teething, but the crying continued well after the gleaming white tooth poked its way through Nelly’s gum. And it was then that Wanda was sure this sadness, this stress, had nothing to do with teeth.

  Wanda spent every second she could with her daughter, yet guilt still gripped her heart. No matter how she managed the rest of her time, she was away from Nelly at least ten hours a day, five days a week.

  Max raised an eyebrow and glanced in the direction of the bedroom, which he also knew so well.

  “Are you babysitting?”

  “I’ll be right back.”

  There was no way out, no turning back. Methodically, she walked to the bedroom, took Nelly in her arms and brought her into the living room.

  “She’s been occupying my time since you left.”

  The color drained from Max’s face, and Wanda braced herself. She felt numb. Nelly wasn’t crying, only gazing at Max, as if curious about this person who looked so much like her.

  “You’re kidding me.”

  “As if I could.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me, Wanda?” His voice was hollow, empty of emotion.

  “You’d counted on that mission for years. I didn’t want to stop you. I told you I understood, that it was the right thing to do.”

  “You still could have told me! At some point, after I was there for a few months.”

  “I couldn’t.”

  A tear slid onto her cheek, and she brushed it away.

  “It’s too late for us now,” she said. “Things are what they are. I’m not expecting anything from you.”

  Max stood up and walked over to the window. He gazed out at the Eiffel Tower, but Wanda was sure he wasn’t seeing it. Her heart was pounding with such intensity she felt as if it were echoing through the entire apartment. Yet in reality, there was simply silence. A silence that frightened Wanda. Galina had been right. Why hadn’t she listened to her?

  “So that’s it?” Max said, turning around. She could see the anger and frustration in his eyes. “You expect me to walk out the door as if everything was right in the world? You expect me to abandon both of you? Wanda, what the hell is going on with you?”

  She wanted to tell him that she had been scared, that she hadn’t wanted to lose him but then lost him anyway. She wanted to tell him that her world was upside down at the moment. She wanted to tell him that she yearned for him to stay. But none of those words would come out. Instead, she reacted with ire and annoyance, redirecting the frustrations of the past months at him.

  “Everything is fine,” she said between clenched teeth. “If you can’t understand that I only did this for you, that I didn’t want to stand in the way of your—”

  “Damn it, Wanda! This is a big deal!” He shook his head and turned away from her, from them. Nelly started whimpering, then went for a full-blown wail. Wanda bounced her around, but the cries only intensified.

  Max turned back to Wanda, reached out a hand to touch her arm. His eyes had softened. But a voice that Wanda couldn’t control spoke before she could stop it.

  “Just go. We don’t need you.”

  Max’s gaze turned to ice. He brushed past them, grabbed his coat and slammed the door.

  Chapter 10

  Wanda wasn’t sure what had become harsher: the chill in the Parisian air or the chill in her office. She and Louis hardly spoke. As a matter of fact, she hardly spoke to anyone. Most of her time was consumed by client meetings and research at her computer. She didn’t have time for water cooler chitchat or drinks after hours. After hours she was doing one of three things: working, spending time with Nelly or sleeping.

  But no one seemed to understand. Flora and Sam and the others—the same group she used to head to the bar with—stumbled into the office later than she ever did, then spent twenty minutes getting coffee, then took several smoke breaks, then took a long lunch, then complained about how many hours they worked as she hurried out the door to pick up Nelly.

  And then there were the occasions when they stopped her as she was about to leave. Wanda knew what to expect. She was used to the comments by now. You’re no fun! Just because you’ve had a baby doesn’t mean your social life has to end! Haven’t you ever heard of a babysitter? And the list went on.

  She would shrug if she was in a decent mood or give them a dirty look if the day had been particularly difficult, but she would never explain, give in or defend herself.

  Sometimes she thought she deserved it. She remembered criticizing not only Elodie for avoiding the after-work routine but also her colleague Kate. Wanda had been the one to roll her eyes when Kate, back from maternity leave, never had time for an evening drink. Now, the memory turned her face scarlet in shame.

  On this mid-December day, Wanda hardly heard the rain pattering on the window just beyond her cubicle, hardly noticed the excitement or voices around her. Her attention was on the charts on her screen, and she didn’t like what she was seeing. It was a bad year for the market. But that didn’t matter to Wanda, and it didn’t matter to her clients. In a bad year, she could still give them a decent return. She always did. But in the past, she wasn’t starting from negative. In the past, she had managed her funds closely, keeping them out of the danger zone. Yet now, despite how hard she worked, fund performance had reeled out of her control. She could bring it back, but it would take time. The damage Thomas had done couldn’t be corrected in a quarter.

  And then, as she was about to close out a position, Thomas was standing by her side with a glass of champagne in his hand.

  “Here,” he said, holding it out to her.

  “What’s this all about? A holiday party?” Wanda knitted her brow and stood up. But she didn’t take the glass. She was wary of any sort of good news coming from someone who was unable to keep a solid fund rolling for three months.

  “I’ve been promoted to senior fund manager,” he said.

  What? she wanted to cry out. That was her level. She was a senior fund manager. And she had worked her ass off to get there. Sadly, she wasn’t even given the position with this sort of pomp and circumstance. By default, as a series of managers quit almost simultaneously, the big bosses were left with the choice of Wanda, Kate (who was on an extended maternity leave), or an intern. That had happened three years ago. And today, Thomas ruined her funds, yet management promoted him to senior fund manager? Just because he was some big shot’s cousin. Kate had been waiting for that kind of promotion for years.

  “Congratulations,” Wanda said stiffly. Then she glanced at the glass, still in midair between them. “And thanks, but I don’t drink on the job.”

  After Thomas made his way back to the others, laughing, drinking and talking, Wanda settled into her seat and executed her trade as if nothing had happened. She pushed aside the anger and the feelings of injustice, and forced herself to focus. Louis was an ass. Thomas was an ass. And the others were being assholes too. She couldn’t reason with people like that. She glanced over at Flora, who laughed and shared stories with Thomas as if they were the best of friends. Flora had spent less and less time stopping by Wanda’s desk to chat. None of them understood Wanda’s priorities. They thought she was being snooty and unsociable because she didn’t have time for cocktails once
a week.

  “How about a coffee?” Maddie’s voice.

  Wanda turned around and smiled, relieved it wasn’t Thomas with another glass of champagne or an asinine comment.

  “Come on,” Maddie coaxed, sensing her hesitation. “Your eyes are red. You could use a break, my dear.”

  Wanda yanked off her glasses and rubbed her eyes, not caring if she smudged her mascara. She was tired. Nelly hadn’t been sleeping nights and neither had she. She thought of Max, that painful encounter only two days ago. Every time her phone rang, she jumped. Would it be him? It wasn’t. And what would she even say? She didn’t know.

  “Well?” Maddie said.

  “In the kitchen?” Wanda suggested meekly.

  “No, let’s go out. Just around the corner. It will do you some good.”

  ~~~~

  They sat at the far end of the counter at the café that had turned sleepy at this mid-afternoon hour. The bartender slid two coffees over to them, and Wanda took a sip.

  “What do you think?” she asked, turning to Maddie.

  “About Thomas and the promotion?”

  “Yes.”

  “I think trouble is brewing.”

  “Yeah,” Wanda said with a snort, “with him in charge of even one fund, the company will go down the toilet.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong, Wanda. They’ve assigned him the most competent associate fund manager. Thomas will sign off on all of her good decisions. And everything will be fine.”

  “That’s disgusting,” Wanda said. She took another sip of coffee, but it didn’t melt the icy feeling inside. “Look at Kate, she’s been waiting for this kind of position and deserves it.”

  “Kate left the company, Wanda.”

  “What? When did that happen?”

  “When you were in China. One minute she was meeting with Louis, and the next, she was carrying a cardboard box with her belongings out the door.”